February 9/10, 2012
So I was having this momentary phase last night that I feel sooo depress and confuse. I just wanted to talk to someone. Well, I guess writing about the past might have done this. It made me thought of some unanswered questions and basically made me thought of the person himself. The good times, the bad and the moments in between. The start of our friendship, falling in love, getting into and ending the relationship. I was thinking of it nonstop! They said lingering back to the past would make us feel bad, but it didn’t. Heck, it even made me laugh and giggle at times. I didn’t know what was it all about. Then I started questioning myself (after almost 4 years I haven’t asked myself this) if I was still in love with him? Thinking about it now, I think I haven’t stopped loving him. It just changed!
So, I kind of done a silly thing. Let’s just say, I “drunk chatted” (but I wasn’t drunk and I’m quite aware with what I’m doing but I don’t know why I’m doing it?) my ex boyfriend last night, and I told him things that I think I shouldn’t have told him. But yea, it was good though because it made everything far more clearer now. I cried a little, made a deep brief sigh and I’m fine again! I guess, my friend was right. I had moved on but I haven’t let him go. Well, not until last night!
It was good. A bit awkward at the end but it was good. And after 4 years of figuring things out, I can now truly say that I’m okay.
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distant-galaxy liked this
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memoblock said:
I can somewhat relate in the last five lines of what you’ve said. I hope you’re okay Jen :)
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